5 Honest Words to Describe the First Year of Motherhood (Updated 2023)

Before we get too far into this, let me just say: There are 1,000 words that can be used to describe the first year of motherhood.

One minute you’re feeling overjoyed, beaming with pride. The next, you’re uncontrollably crying in complete disarray, wondering how you’re going to be all that this little baby deserves.

Truth be told, before becoming a mom, many women told me, “Motherhood is difficult.”

And to be completely honest, I didn’t understand the gravity of their words.

I didn’t understand how deeply I could love a little miniature human. Desperately, wanting to soak up every hiccup, sneeze, and coo she made. I wanted to bask her her newborn scent.

All people should have a honest glimpse into the realities of a first-time mom’s thoughts. So, here are 5 brutally honest words to describe my first year as a mother.

Honest Words to Describe Motherhood

I could easily do the whole alphabet to describe motherhood: amazing, beautiful, chaotic. But for now, these are the 5 most honest words I can use to describe my experience as a first-time mom.

1. Boring

Let’s just get this out of the way, babies are boring.

I’m a busy-body by nature. In fact, for as long as I can remember I’ve said, “I’d rather be busy than bored.” (I’m an Enneagram 3 #IYKYK.) Then, I became a first-time mom.

New babies sleep. A lot. When they wake up, they don’t really do a whole lot. I mean, there’s only so much tummy time I can realistically enjoy watching.

It’s hard to admit, but the newborn stage, especially as a first-time mom, can be a little boring. #sorrynotsorry

To be completely transparent, I put immense pressure on myself to make sure I was doing everything “right.” And because of that, I put my needs at the very bottom of the priority list.

Because I didn’t do the things that filled me up, I felt often felt trapped.

In hindsight, three-years later and now a mom-of-two, I would tell me first-time mom self, to do the things I wanted to do much sooner. And to let go of other people’s expectations.

2. Hyper-vigilant

This is in direct conflict with the previous word, bored, but hear me out.

There is an indescribable amount of love and connection a mom feels toward her first baby. And because of this, she is met with fear. Fear that something might happen to this perfect little creation.

For that reason, I constantly felt like I had to be “on,” hyper-vigilant about any lurking danger. Mentally, my first year of motherhood drained me in a way I never knew possible.

Hyper-vigilance was not something I was ready for. This mixture of boredom and hyper-vigilance puts moms on the fast-track to postpartum anxiety (PPA).

It’s like you’re trapped in your own mind about all the possible things that could go wrong without anywhere to go.

I’ve been very open about my experience with postpartum anxiety, depression, and rage. Thankfully, I’ve overcome those darker days and found ways to rediscover myself after motherhood.

One word I use to describe motherhood to hyper-vigilance. — I was always wondering if I’ll be enough for her.

3. Demanding

The demands of motherhood can be both depleting and augmenting.

Depleting, in that the literal act of sharing my body, was physically draining. So much so, I described my breastfeeding daughter as a vampire, sucking life right out of me. I could actually feel the energy being drained from my body.

Even though there is a negative connotation to the word demanding, the demands of motherhood aren’t always negative.

Knowing my little baby needs me, and fulfilling those needs, is one of the most gratifying feelings I’ve ever experienced.

It’s annoyingly true that babies grow up too fast. And the opportunity to be needed by my little bundle of joy was something I did not take lightly.

4. Guilt-Ridden

Mom-guilt is a manipulative little sh*t.

He creeps in different doors and pores, then settles in the deepest part of the heart. Just when you think you’ve gotten rid of the brute, his sly little self slithers back in and cozies up.

His voice is menacing. “Other moms don’t do that.” “You’re not playing with her enough.” “She deserves better.”

It’s very hard work fighting the monster that is mom-guilt, but that doesn’t mean we can’t win the war.

I’m happy to report, time is on our side. With time, practice, and a lot of self-compassion, that little monster shrinks to nothing more than a soft, periodic whisper.

5. Complete

The day-to-days of motherhood are a lot like taking a cross county road trip. Confusing directions, bewildering mergers, and unexpected stops along the way.

One day, I’m cruising along in the fast lane, no other cars in sight, feelin’ really good about the drive.

The next day, the carpool lane is closed; I’m alone in bumper-to-bumper traffic, avoiding a major accident by sheer luck.

But then you get to the destination and you feel a sense of peace and calm rush over you. Like everything is right in the world.

Being a mom has made me feel like that. Like I should be here, like I belong, like I’ve arrived. I am complete.

The first year of motherhood can be describe in many words, but here are my favorite 5 — Complete is the best word I can use to describe motherhood.

The Wrap Up: 5 Honest Words to Describe the First Year of Motherhood

Being a mom is both the greatest joy and extremely challenging.

I propose we stop pretending like motherhood is all butterflies and rainbows. There are certainly many, many moments of pure bliss and unmatched happiness.

And there are just as many difficulties and hardships endured by moms on a day-to-day basis.

While motherhood is entirely worth it, we need to normalize all the feelings moms feel. I’m here to do just that.

If you’re struggling with being a first-time mom, please don’t hesitate to connect with me. After all, we’re all in this together.